I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
