yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
