found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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