Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
You took a bar mat shot.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
You ate ashes out of my bong
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
