Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
