i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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