It's like God shit irony all over that family
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
