Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
