Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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