p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
