I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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