So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize