I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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