no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
