You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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