God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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