tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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