just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
