Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
