Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
