i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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