I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
