Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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