the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
