..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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