who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
