I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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