he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
NoShamevember. You game?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
