with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
