Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
