he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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