Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
