Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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