Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
So squirting runs in the family.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
