i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
