dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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