I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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