Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize