So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
