You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize