So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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