my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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