sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
