We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
