i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
