and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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