why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
