If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
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