This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
So much Jack, so little girl.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
