and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
you win again, gameday.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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